Happy belated April Fools’ Day everyone! I was thinking about trying to trick you all that I got a big-time position for MTV doing awesome stuff like interviewing Jack Black and finding out if Ozzie Osbourne still remembers how to speak English… but then I realized the bigger joke would be that I managed to get MTV to hire me. All joking aside, this year was as good as ever for April Fools’ Day pranks that have been posted all around the Internet. I’ll be honest, even knowing that these posts were jokes, I truly do wish some of these concepts were real because they’re freaking awesome. And since I think you would find these pranks just as awesome as I did, here are my favorite and most creative online April Fools’ Day jokes published this year. Please visit the links included; the articles and videos are hilarious!

London department of transportation announces new loop-the-loop subway route
Found on: http://twitter.com/DLRLondon/statuses/450928834712322048
    Let’s be honest here, unless you are an avid train enthusiast or lover of sketchy homeless people, the subway in pretty much any city in the world is damn boring. Why not add some amusement park thrill to make the ride more entertaining? On April 1, the organization made the announcement on Twitter with an accompanying picture that a single loop-the-loop will be added at the Canary Wharf stop. I’d visit the city just to ride this loop-the-loop and I would be completely satisfied with my journey.

CERN switches default font to Comic Sans
Found on: http://home.web.cern.ch/about/updates/2014/04/cern-switch-comic-sans

     The European Organization for Nuclear Research (if you’re wondering why the acronym is different than the organization’s name, it’s the French’s fault) is known as one of the top research organizations in the world. It’s important for scientists working for CERN to produce articles in the most professional manner, and it’s hard to express the importance and sincerity of the work without the inclusion of Comic Sans. So, starting April 1, every online CERN article will be published in this font and the world will therefore become a better place.

Reddit introduces Headdit: browsing with your head…literally

    The self-proclaimed front page of the Internet has once again revolutionized online browsing by using your computer’s video camera to detect head movements that translate into actions on the website. Want to give a comment an upvote? Simply nod your head yes. Downvote? A small frown will suffice. Scrolling can also be easily done by tilting your head up or down. Even holding your precious feline in view of the camera will initiate the remarkable Cat Mode, which is any Redditor’s wet dream. Sorry, no dogs allowed, as they are an inferior species.

Rosetta Stone releases Klingon language learning software

    Thanks to Thinkgeek.com, for only $270, you can be on the fast track to learn the nerdiest of all nerd languages, Klingon from the TV series Star Trek! To help promote the product, a video hosted by actor Michael Dorn (famous for his role as Lt. Worf in the series) takes us through the many advantages of learning Klingon from Rosetta Stone, such as finally communicating with your child for the first time and having a truly romantic marriage proposal. I can’t wait until next year’s release of Dothraki and High Valyrian!

Northeastern plans construction of new “text-and-walk” pathways on campus
Found on: http://www.northeastern.edu/news/2014/04/text-and-walk-lanes/
    Finally, no one has to awkwardly bump into another person while performing important tasks on their smart phone such as checking the latest celebrity gossip on Twitter or upgrading your units in Clash of Clans! Much like how a bicycle lane operates on a vehicular road, new “text-and-walk” pathways will be constructed right next to the school’s regular walking pathways to ensure a safe route for the status updater on the fly. Better yet, campus volunteers will be stationed at the end of each lane to ensure maximum safety. If you’re a fan of walking with headphones on, I hope you like the sound of an air horn getting your attention!

One Direction banned from North Korea until they get their hair cut
Found on: http://www.mirror.co.uk/3am/celebrity-news/one-direction-kim-jong-un-north-3320077
    Congratulations to One Direction for finally making it in my column! Now let’s hope they never get mentioned in it again. Clearly, these kids’ hairstyles are not only unorthodox; they’re downright disturbing and an insult to the human race. It only makes sense for the band to get a more conservative cut if they plan on taking stage in Best Korea, much like Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un’s modest hairdo that could also fit right in place in a Three Stooges skit. I guess we can’t expect the band to be performing in the glorious Democratic People’s Republic of Korea any time soon. I have no idea if that’s good or bad.
Google is awesome. That is all.
    Leave it to Google to go above and beyond to accomplish anything…even if the title is best April Fools’ prankster of the year. The gigantic tech company is known for pulling off multiple pranks on the holiday, and I wish there was enough space on this page for me to talk about all of them. Still, I cannot end this column without sharing my two favorites of theirs from this year:

Photobombs with David Hasselhoff
Found on: https://plus.google.com/+VicGundotra/posts/8CxY5XDjYgw
    Celebrity photobombs are all the rage now, and us poor blue-collared folk don’t have any famous friends to join in the fun. Well, now we can be just like the cool kids and have our own David Hasselhoff photobomb on any picture uploaded to Google+! Just leave space for him in the photo, and voila!

Google Maps Pokémon Challenge
Found on: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4YMD6xELI_k
    I know I’m not the only one who wishes this was real. Using the impressive technology of augmented reality and Google Maps, we can travel the planet and catch more than 100 Pokémon on our journey of being the world’s first real-life Pokémon Master! I don’t even care about the fake job opportunity at Google; this game needs to happen!